ESSAY
The Things They Carried, The Things They Gave Us
In diaspora communities, we often discuss the generations before us in a way that can invalidate them. We sometimes forget what they’ve had to go through: some things we may never have to experience – the things they have seen, heard and done in order to be who they are today. Maybe the stubbornness we sometimes see in them is born from this. Maybe our stubbornness to understand them is what leads to our disconnect.
When finding a place for our own identity, as British Indians, we tend to look at what the world projects onto us – where are we allowed to fit in and which seats are we supposed to fill? The dialogue that starts within our family home is often dismissed for being different, but isn’t ‘being different’ our suffering too? We can’t begin to discover ourselves without looking at the journey of our ancestors.
Many of our grandparents survived partition and moved across seas to replenish themselves. They still speak in their mother tongue because their home was left behind. We need to wonder: how did they find their identities? In a space where they were told to “go back home”, had racial slurs thrown at them, people were killed and beaten – they had to find a home and security within this. These occurrences haven’t changed much, we still experience bigotry and racism – no one person’s experience is more relevant than the others. Let’s just not completely invalidate them.